Transitional Pressure

I am going through a transition…

1

tran·si·tion

tranˈziSH(ə)n,tranˈsiSH(ə)n/

noun

  1. the process or a period of changing from one state or condition to another.

A transition to what, not sure. Something positive, of course.

I don’t find myself moody but I find myself yearning for something real. I find that others find me moody, but I’m clearly misunderstood.

I just graduated school and have to take my stateboard at the end of the month, can you feel the pressure through the computer?

Some days and some weeks, I’m super busy, and others I have all the free time in the world. People do not understand that. Dating is out the question. I tried that, he’s used to something that I can’t give him. Attention he would receive on a consistent bases would stop sometimes. Not bc I hate him but bc I’M BUSY. He could not get that so I won’t waste my time trying to get to know someone else.

I really am a boss, a working entrepreneur and if someone cannot understand that I can’t give them constant attention all the time, they not for me. If I tell you I’m busy, that does not mean blow up my phone, DM me on IG, or hit up my other phone #. I regret making myself so accessible to people, to where they think that doing all that is ok. That’s a red flag.

I am in a transitional period where I am taking a huge risk on myself with my business and I can only handle good vibes and realness. The direction that I am going calls for me to only associate myself with the real ones because the BlOW is about to happen. Anyone causing extra drama, just can’t come with me on that level. I have to set boundaries. My future self depends on it.

Sometimes I feel shutting down from everyone is the answer. Complete isolation. Maybe I should…

In the state of Unknowingly Knowing

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